Quote of the century...

Gordon just said that he "saved the world" at PMQs.

Cue two solid minutes of laughter. The speaker was ignored and Brown mocked.

Keep taking the medication Gordo...


Update - As requested:

How to run a bath....

It seems Team Gordo has cocked up again in it's handling of the Ruth Kelly resignation... If he can't even run his press operation, how is he meant to run the country?

TB is beginning to pity their ineptness

, so in a rare flash of generosity here is a simple instruction video...



Start with the basics shall we...

Spot the Tories...

After his withering attack on LabourHome’s poll declaring that most of the party membership want Gordon Brown to leave office,

Luke Akehurst

has set up a group called "

We don’t want a Labour leadership election

"

Unfortunately for him it has,

like the poll

, been hijacked by Tories. Within its ranks are such well known-leftwingers as a former researcher to a Conservative MP, two Conservative Future chairmen and countless centre-right bloggers, including yours truly.

It's a sad day for any Labour Prime Minister when his only friends are members and supporters of the opposition.

Hat-Tip:

Benjamin Gray

Boycott JK Rowling

So JK Rowling has just given a million pounds to the Labour Party because of their "track record of fighting child poverty." This sum is a mere small fraction of 1% of her wealth, and though we were told that the era of celebrity politics is over this is a nice stunt for day one of Labour's conference. All they need is another 20 JK Rowling sized donations and Labour might just get on the road to financial recovery...

This is a classic bit of spin, no one mentions the the fact that we will recognise marriage in the tax system. Taxes and benefits should encourage families to stay together, but the current system actually encourages couples to live apart. We will correct this by removing the anti-families bias, paying for it from our new Family Fund, into which all extra green taxes will be put. More than Rowling's personal friend Brown is doing.

No one mentions the fact that we will end the couple penalty in the tax credits system. Instead of keeping people on benefits and locked in a cycle of deprivation, we will support families. We will increase the Working Tax Credit that couples currently receive from £3,430 to £5,385 – an increase of up to £38 per week. This will cost £3 billion. 1.8 million of the poorest couples with children will gain, on average, £32 a week. The direct effect will be to lift 300,000 children in two-parent families out of poverty. We will pay for it from savings made through our radical programme of welfare reform. More than Brown is doing.

TB is glad now he has never read more than a page of the Harry Potter books she has churned out over the years...

Join him in his Facebook group campaign to boycott her work.

Everyone who has ever bought one of her books has now donated to the Labour Party.

No doubt now that she will end up in the House of Lords - Baroness Rowling of Hogwarts.

Air Jonah

Remember

when that plane fell out of the sky above Heathrow in January?

Well today the official report blames ice in the fuel

. A previously unheard of problem...blah blah... Tory Bear can reveal that the real reasons this happened was because Gordon Brown was on the way to China and his motorcade drove under the approach path of BA038. TB has it good authority that his car had recently been installed with a brand new security system which utilised a RF transmitter to block out any mobile phone triggered bombs. These systems can have up to a two mile range and it apparently caused the Boeing 777 EEC’s (electronic engine controls) to sense a “over-boost” situation, thereby commanding a reduced-thrust situation for the engines.

Now it was originally spun that Gordo was already in the lounge when the plane came down but look what

Ben Brogan

said at the time

"This gets weirder. The PM's motorcade was coming up the A4 as the plane approached and at one point his detectives grew alarmed. The suggestion is the stricken Airbus misjudged its approach and nearly took out the PM..."

Coincidence? TB thinks not...



Having originally been sceptical about this story TB commented that it could have been a bird flying into the engine. His contact had this option covered though -

"Yeah but there were no feathers"

Poor Darling

Maybe TB is going soft in his old age but he can't help but feel sorry for Darling. It's a new low for the man banned from most pubs in the country when he can't even order a second bottle of wine in a restaurant without being public rebuked by a waiter. You have to feel sorry the guy, especially given the position he is in...

Darling's

interview

in the Guardian today shows a different side of the man trapped in his own loyalty: "For Brown to repay his friend's loyalty by sacking him would be brutal - even Shakespearean. But then, politics can be like that. Darling is one of the most experienced politicians in the country. And yet, more than once, I find myself wondering how much of a political animal he really is."

Of all the characters in this unfolding tragedy you have to wonder when Darling will reach breaking point - he has taken the fall for Gordan's mistakes in the past and he continues to take the fall now and still his boss has the audacity to brief against him. The loyal friend and ally is being stamped and trodden on and you have to wonder if he will be a

Stamper

to Gordon's Urquhart?

A Howe moment from Darling and it's curtains for Gordo...

It's Alive!!!

Thursday

Apologies for the lack of posts today.. been working on something big. Also interviewed Michael Rock over lunch. Will report on that in the morning.

In the mean time

Dizzy

has this hilarious little scoop... Team Brown are preparing to launch Number10tv, no not a cheap spin off of 18 Doughty Street but in fact GB's very own internet broadcasts from the Downing Street website....

You would have thought those running this glorious nation would have the sense to buy the domain name

https://number10tv.com/

though would you not?

Check it out for a laugh!

A very well timed prank by the

Freedom Fighters

Is Zoe still crying?

Remember this classic... All the more relevant these days:



As Miliband said...

"Wouldn't it be nice if that Tony Blair came back"

A tale of two bank collapses...

A couple of things got me thinking about Northern Rock again earlier.

• Firstly a man wearing the most ridiculously tied tie interrupted the news with the sports headlines, how does a broke bank who owe the British taxpayer countless billions find the resources to
  sponsor
  a premiership football club?

• Secondly and on a more serious note I got into a chat with the American about the initial
  reports
  that the worst of the
  credit crunch
  in the States might be over
  (?)
  , the beginning of the end so to speak. We both agreed that were these reports to be believed then Americans might just be avoiding catastrophe by the skin of their teeth. The US governments handling of the situation might just have worked.

The US and UK government's handling of the potential collapse of two serious market contenders, Northern Rock and Bear Stearns couldn't have been more different. Where supervision from the Federal Reserve in the shape of

$30 billion

, enabled JP Morgan Chase to take over Bear Sterns and put it back on the road to recovery so successfully that $1 billion of the debt was recovered within two weeks, the nationalised Rock has yet to be able to cough up a single penny of the

£91 billion

it owes you and I.