Simon Says...

...please chill out.

TB wasn't sure what Simon Cavalier Jones was expecting in this race but:

"It's shocking how tribal and petty these elections have become. Elections should be fun, ideas should be banded about, people should be lobbying candidates and drinking with them. It's amazing the amount of rubbish talked about these Elections and the smearing.

CF should be fun, we after all are the Young Generation, it should be about meeting friends, politics and party's. Not spouting off arrogant nonsense and accusing people of things they have not done. Sadly this behaviour is what drives people away from us and it must stop.

Most people outside of CF see us as about as progressive as Cliff Richard! We need to show that as a Party, we are normal young people and the tone of these elections is not helping. Let's have some fun, have some laughs and reduce the amount of pomp involved. I for one promise to buy a beer for the funniest comment below (for or against me)."

Has that cold feeling of "what have I done?" dawned one of the candidates? Oh well.. will hold him to the beers.

Cometh the Hour, Cometh the Cox

So the CF bandwagon rolls on.

London Spin

is putting TB to shame with the coverage though there have been complaints about the accuracy of all the details...

Howlett is racking up the miles, and the bartabs apparently. Activists were left unimpressed when he told an hustings crowd he was going to "feed the parking meter" before attempting to drive to another campaign event elsewhere. "Forgetting" to pay his bill on the way out...

Simon Cavalier Jones has locked in the north if their reactions to visits from Howlett are concerned. His team are picking up momentum. Given the rate of bitchy emails flying about TB would say SCJ is gaining on Howlett who is still the frontrunner mainly on name association. Nothing like a bit of mudslinging to amuse TB.

But that is all set to change as it becomes clear that the rumours are true - Craig Cox, student politics supremo and NUS conversation starter, staffer to various MPs and bit of a lad, is due to throw his hat into the ring.

Cox who has reduced lefties to tears with philibustering NUS debates and adding (literally) hundreds of amendments. He could and probably should write a book on how to piss off student unions. He's not shy of a fight and whilst this is still unconfirmed, Cox's candidacy would certainly liven things up.

CCHQ  and the other candidates are going to love the rumour that the slogan is the rather harsh "Cox not Cocks."

PMQs Thoughts - Hypocritical Harman and Boorish Bercow

A strange mood at PMQs today, the leaders were actually quite funny and it was a much less stilted performance from Harman than usual. For a second TB thought that the honourable members had actually listened to Bercow and were chilling out a bit. Harman pulled off the joke about partners and mothers well but Dave was quick on the come back with the CND dig. Harman should know the rules state you leave the mothers out of arguments though.

Although it was clearly a joke, Harman continues to insinuate that Clegg and Cameron are in a gay relationship with her "partner" comparisons. Yes everyone has made the same joke, but this is Ms Political Correctness we are talking about. Imagine is someone made a joke about Harman being a lesbian, there would be outrage from not only her but her army of puppeting drones who weigh in whenever anyone dares to criticise. TB's beef is not with the joke but Harman's hypocrisy.

The good humour couldn't last for long though. The last few Harman questions were back to the more heated exchanges we know and love. Bercow had the audacity to tell the Prime Minister to shut up before he answered a question. He was quick to to defend the PM later, on more than on occasion, seeming like he was trying to make up for overstepping the mark.

The Speaker is on thin ice, he is a servant of the House not a leader. He should not be preaching outside of the House about how members should behave, it is completely outside his rightly limited and focused mandate. He is damaging his authority, a fatal flaw in a Speaker. He wont be able to stay for long if he is pushes his luck too far.

A few interesting questions from the Backbenches, but after a good opening ten minutes, it all tailed off rather.

Dave 4 Bercow 0 Harman 4 

Exclusive: Leaked Chapter of Gordon's Book

The Speccie

is reporting that Gordon has been typing 10,000 words a day of his new book. That’s 580,000 words already. Tolstoy took 4 years and 460,000 words to write War and Peace and didn't have the taxpayer subsidising his writing time.

TB's man in the publishing world has slipped him one of the most explosive chapters of Brown's new book which his people are drumming up interest with:



It looks like it's going to be a cracking read.

TV's Shane Greer Cant Stop

Not content with talking head domination, TV's Shane Greer has taken to doing underwear ads:



Joking apart it seems

Peachy Pink

have poached the lovely Mrs Greer from the CCHQ digital team and she is now running the social media campaign for underwear company. Pants that smell of peach eh?

As If You Could Ever Forget

Go behind the scenes of Sky News, on that day:



Very cool.

LBC Tonight

Tune to the LBC 97.3 if you are in London or listen online

here

from 8pm to listen to TB having a wee chat.


You can tweet questions and comments to him live via

@torybear

.

The Perfect Campaign Video

"I possess a sort of sociopathic narcissism that makes me think I should be in charge of everyone"

Also looks like that baby stole TB's suit.

Tip if the bear ears to

Obo

.

Questions to Which the Answer is No

No TB hasn't turned into John Rentoul but he is laughing his head off about one of the most arrogant press releases he has ever received:

"Is this Braintree's next MP?

A 16 year old teenager from Braintree is fast cementing his place among Britain's political elite. Stephen Canning who is studying A levels at Colchester Sixth Form College has been billed as the next potential MP of Braintree or even Prime minister. As founder of the Braintree Youth Council and then Chairman of the Braintree Conservative Future, Stephen Canning quickly rose in the political ranks. But then he got bored. He wanted a bigger challenge. Much bigger. So he asked himself: What are the three largest, most largest, most important, most difficult challenges facing young people? The answer: health, education and crime - then he tried to tackle all three at once.

Braintree, Essex (BCF) June 22, 2010 -- Stephen Canning, a 17 year old student from Braintree has been given a position on the Youth Crime Stakeholder Advisory Group, directly advising the new coalition government on crime policy and implementation, and as an officer of the All Party Parliamentary Children's Group."

It is well worth reading the rest of the cringe-worthily self -congratulating tripe

here

. So is he 16 or 17?

Press releasing from an email address at thetoryboy.com doesn't help either. Talk about making yourself a target.

Labour's Budget Response:

Not much has changed has it.

‘Take Back Parliament Sq.’ Protest

Intriguing press realease TB just got...

Free market protesters are tonight testing the inclusiveness of Parliament Square's 'Democracy Village' by organising an opposing protest there.

Young activists will legally enter the square and provide a vocal and visual challenge to the illegal camp. They will be protesting against the views espoused by the campers, including defending capitalism and necessary action to close the budget deficit.

Organiser Donna Edmunds explains why: "True democracy only happens when a range of ideas are discussed. But the illegal campers in 'Democracy Village' represent extreme fringe opinions. They want an end to Westminster politics, say that the recent election was illegal, and oppose the ownership of property."


"They don't represent democracy - they've hijacked democracy. By camping on Parliament Square, the villagers are stopping other people from being heard by those in Parliament. We all deserve the right to have our views heard, and that's why we're holding them to their promise. There's nothing democratic about Democracy Village."

Might have to swing by the Westminster Arms later and see if it kicks off... 6pm apparently.

Why We Need the EU

Ever wondered where we could save a little cash? A topical question today. Why not start with the ridiculous amount of money we pour into the European Union. And you're not going to like it when you see just what your hard earned bucks are spent on. TB wonders how long it took, and how much the EU Directorate-General for Infrastructure and Logistics (DG INLO) are paid:

What treat have they prepared for zee useless Parliament staff? Well a slide show of course:



So there we go mes amies, now you know how to use a trunk. Another victory for the Project!

Just incase you forgot...

...what they said in the election:



TB hopes the coaliton won't be that stupid. The softening up has certainly been sustained over the weekend but you would have thought the hints on VAT would have been stronger to weaken the blows. It's an open goal to the likes of Balls and is a tax that should be being slashed. We need people spending more not less right now. Grumble.

Racy Stacy's Dangerous Divulgence

Like John Prescott, Stacey Bott (known in Tory circles as Anastasia Beaumont-Bott) just won’t go away. She left the Tory party at the height of the election campaign because of “ingrained homophobia.” Nobody is quite sure why, just months after singing the party’s praises for being so inclusive, she decided to jump ship to Labour. Best estimate is that she no longer felt she was getting the exposure she deserved through being the self styled only gay in the Tory village. And so, with great fanfare, she denounced her former friends and colleagues and took to the stage with David Miliband to tell us all how nasty the Conservatives are and how the Labour party has always been her natural home. Inevitably, even Labour bored of her tokenism and self promotion. You can read some background here. 

So how can this political rubix cube propel herself back into the public eye? The answer, obviously, was to

sell a story to the Mail

about her sex life. Proudly boasting about how Caroline Nokes’s young lover James Dinsalde turned her gay - and on behalf of men everywhere, TB would like to thank him for that. She went on to moan about how he promised her trips to Paris and boasted of his wealth. Yet again, ABB litters the interview with references to her muddled and eclectic sex life. Is she bi? Was she ever gay? Is it all just an elaborate web of “who gives a shit” pre-teen style attention seeking? Who knows, if she is such a lefty now why is she whoring herself to the bastion of the right-wing press?

What we do know though, is that she should be more careful about commenting on other peoples’ sex lives when photos are currently doing the rounds of her engaged in some pretty steamy video chat via MSN . TB has seen these photos, as have most of Westminster. Sailing close to the wind by inviting tabloids to look into her private life much?

The sooner people see through this shameless self-promoting wannabe the better. TB has said it before and will say it again, Labour are welcome to her, though it seems even they are distancing themselves. The sign of the ultimate political failure is when someone starts their own political party. Answers on a post card as to what her political party would be called...

Guest Post: From Opposition to Government

Outgoing CF deputy chairman Christian May has some advice for whoever will be taking over...

Some things are certain. For example, John Prescott will always have a chip on his shoulder. Ed Balls will always be the least popular politician in the country. Ellie Gellard will always flog dead political horses. And, as surely as dawn follows dusk, Conservative Future elections will descend into spats, blog wars and cliques. I'm not going to condemn this, as it would be hypocritical of me to do so. However, I am going to suggest that for the first time in the history of Conservative Future, something genuinely exciting awaits the new team at the top.

Conservative Future has never existed under a Conservative government. Created in 1998, ours is an organisation that has only ever know opposition. A child of its time and a product of circumstances, CF focused its energy on campaigning - and rightly so. Mark Clarke in particular, and his successor Michael Rock, kept up a relentless focus on CF's role as a campaigning body with one thing in its sights; the general election. The membership, too, understood this need. When I stood for election to the CF Exec, I didn't quite understand that. I made grand statements about how CF should be an "agent of political debate." Etc. I had ideas that we could champion policy issues, raise money, launch campaigns, critique the Party if need be. Whilst these things sometimes developed at a local level, it never became the focus of the National Exec. And nor should it have. I'm pleased to say I quickly realised what Michael knew; that the purpose of CF was to help get Conservative MPs elected. That's what CF helped to do, and that's Michael's legacy.

However, whilst the general election may have marked the end of a project in one sense, it heralds great possibility for the future direction of our organisation. All that is needed is a Chairman candidate who appreciates, and I mean really appreciates, the unique opportunity that faces Conservative Future. Whilst I may be stepping back from CF, I would like nothing more than to see a Chairman who grasps the opportunity to lead a movement of young Conservative activists, free from the shackles of a relentless general election campaign. I'd like to see a Chairman that tirelessly champions the views of the membership, and stands up on issues that matter to them. I'd like to see a chairman that criticises the government if they feel it necessary, whilst promoting the ideas of a free market, a small state, social justice and civil liberties.

All of this is possible in a way that it wasn't during the last 18 months. We had our focus, now you must have yours. So this is my rallying call to chairman candidates; be bold. Be ambitious. Recognise the opportunity you have before you, and sell that vision to the membership with energy and clarity. Enjoy the chance we never had; to be part of a movement that stretches from Downing Street to college campuses. Conservative Future has only ever know opposition. Just think about that, and think about the opportunities it gives a new Chairman.

Two Front-runners

That pesky

London Spin

beat TB to reprinting the email to it but this did make him chuckle last night. Simon Cavalier Jones launches his leadership bid for the Tory youth wing in the same building as David Miliband was pitching for some other job:

"Miliband was not best pleased when I told him I was standing for CF chair and then ran away, thanked him for attending my Campaign launch but make it clear his attendance was not necessary."

The EU Don't Want Our Money?

Yeah right.

Another Hat in the Ring

Simon Cavalier-Jones is speaking at a big CF area meeting tonight in Leeds. TB understands the will be declaring he is running and giving a speech setting out his plans for CF and then asking for the endorsement Yorkshire CF. In terms of regions Yorkshire is on the biggest and most active and any candidate with their support has to be a runner in this election.

East Midlands CF have already endorsed his candidacy, so we're looking at the prospect of a Northern power base Not much is known about Cavalier-Jones, except that he is 25 and works in consultancy. He worked across the East Midlands on the target seat campaign during the elections. He is certainly looking like the outside candidate and is said to have a fair bit of cash behind his bid.

PMQs Thoughts

A somewhat old school PMQs today with some heightened exchanges. We're not back to the Dave and Gordon boxing bouts but a certain escalation from the subdued exchanges of the last two weeks.

Cameron's Star Trek joke fell a bit flat but wasn't a patch on the shocking delivery of Harman's lines. She needs to ditch the script and act quicker on her feet. Lots of grumpiness floating around in the chamber. Did that IPSA debate upset a few of the poor dears?


PS. TB will be on Sky News tonight chatting about banking reform with Will Straw from Left Foot Forward. Tune in at 7pm.

A View From the Stump

So after a certain amount of wrangling TB managed to get a seat at last night's Fabians Society Labour Leadership hustings. After getting over the initial excitement of seemingly making Kerry McCarthy's day, things soon got underway.

What was immediately clear from the outset is Ed Miliband had the crowd, he just had to get close to something that resembled competent rhetoric and they erupted. He was good in a NUS sort of way, though one thing that seriously let him down was his constant muttering and laughing with Ed Balls whenever Diane Abbott was speaking. It looked pathetic and juvenile.

Diane Abbott was able to command the same sort of reaction. Much has been said of Abbott's husting performances and how she is able to "play the room". While yes she was sticking on her safe ground, it wasn't so much that she was playing the room, but that they genuinely agree with her outlook and stance, and she is capitalising on that. The whole event would have been mighty dull without her on the platform, if only for the loss of Balls and David Miliband's constant patting her on the back and painful attempts at trying to share a joke with her.

Andy Burnham was very good in a Home Secretarial kind of way. He isn't going to win but there is passion there. He needs to break away from simply talking about his background and dog whistling certain parts of the movement. It was like watching an early Cameron - nice rhetoric but very little bite.

David Miliband failed to live up to his promised prime-ministerial aura. Whoever is writing his soundbites needs to be taken out and shot. "A living memorial", the "poetry of change", "the two engines of progressive change" etc etc. It weakened what was otherwise a polished performance.

And finally what of TB's favourite candidate Ed Balls? To give him credit he can actually put some passion into his speaking which is more to be said than other mono-toned and dreary platform dwellers. He was desperate to be seen as a normal guy and constantly interrupted with attempted quips and one liners. Most of these fell flat leaving him looking like the guy in a nightclub who is still yelling in a girls ear when the music has stopped.

Balls took a long and deliberate moment to talk of the upset caused by his reputation and the treatment of him by the media and more specifically right-wing blogs. There was no denying he was talking about

Guido Fawkes

, though it was nice of

Ellie

and

Sally

to give TB evils at that point. C'mon guys we are on the same team now.

Balls's should take a long hard think about why those of the right and Tories are so keen to see him elected. Fresh out of his bullying interview at the weekend, he continued to tout for the sympathy vote by essentially saying how upsetting the stuff he reads online is. Which is odd given he has previously denied ever reading blogs.

This "poor me" strategy is weakened further by what Balls's own campaign team are saying. Tom Watson made perfectly clear in a

Guardian article

that if you can't be heckled by Guido Fawkes you are not fit to be a leader. Ed Balls's media and online reputation is nothing but karma. 

Gender equality, Iraq, Electoral Reform, votes at 16, definitions of socialism. All these burning issues were what the candidates had to talk about last night. There were two mentions in the whole evening of the deficit. Labour didn't lose because they lost votes to the Greens and the Lib Dems at the election, (factors discussed,) they lost because people voted for David Cameron instead of Gordon Brown (not discussed.) Not one candidate gave any mention of a plan to make sure Labour win over the floating voters who backed them in '97, '01 and '05 and abandoned them in 2010. Until they address that on the stump, these fifteen odd hustings meetings are nothing but a waste of time, hot air, and anecdotes about their state school educations and SpAd days.